Monday, April 28, 2008

Tales from years ago

small note : have problems with uploading photos and videos to bloggers T.T so cant write to post on the party...


this friend of mine, sometimes will talk about his problem with me.
His stories, if i am going to tell you here, i shall start from years ago.
i would like to apologize before i start, about this story, i actually do not know how much i know, i am sure i only know some part, or more accurately, i only hear the story from one side. I am sure there's more things that i do not know from the other parties.

Okay, to start off.

I am going to introduce 3 guys. Let's name them K, W and Y. And a girl V.

The story started in summer 2005. Two boys K and W fall for the same girl. But the girl have a crush on another boy Y. Things like this always happen, unavoidable. But this will be a problem when the 3 boys are friends. Although boys are always tak apa (translation : never mind) when they have some conflict, no cats fight, no bitching. But things will be different when it comes to relationship. It something related to the rest of your life, something related to your zhong shen xing fu (终身幸福). Don't play play le..

so, both K and W try hard to please V. How hard??I don't know, i am not paparazzi.

later on, the situation become even more complicated. Two boys and a girl. The girls have to pick, from two who did not win her heart in the beginning. She kinda picked W(not because of looks, for sure), and hurt another party badly, badly...

The other boy was sad, heart broken, badly wounded. I don't know whether he cried. But what i know is that this had a really great impact on his life. He lost the omph to move forward, gave up a lot of things that he can actually achieve. He does not do very good in public exams. Something very serious to a student like him. He chose to go to another university because he do not want to be in the same uni as her.

Although the thing actually happened 2 years ago, but this thing haunted him until now. We talked over this matters for so many times. We keep repeating the same matter over and over, how she hurt him, how he feel hurt, how he cant let go, how the past influence his life. I always ask him to let go the past, put down the past that slow him down, or even make him stop from moving on. He keep telling me he can't and how its so hard.

I always wonder why cant he let go the girl, someone who hurt him so much. Someone i don't think worth him to spend these few years for. I just don't understand. I try to persuade him to let go, n move on. As a friend, i don't want to see a boy like him to be unable to achieve the things he want. its so sad to see a young man to be depress because of someone who is not worth it. Come on, she gave up on you, why are you carrying her with you all the time, it just add on to the weight of burden on your back, the past is dragging you, slowing you down.

I admit that, sometimes i am very stubborn. I want things to go as i wished. I am not very happy why he is so difficult to be persuade. Why he don't want to let go, until yesterday.

I don't know why i suddenly give up on telling him to give up. I suddenly realize that i cant force people do the things they don't want to. If it really matters him so much, y i should bother? If he wants to carry the matter with him, to remind him of the mistakes he made in the past, y not?? I kinda like something he said : We can't live in the past, but the past lives within us.

Although i don't like to carry the past with me. I am happy-go-lucky, I am the one who is always tak apa with all the things, but doesn't mean the others should be the same as me. People can choose their life, they can pick the way of their life. Shouldn't I just try to understand him and give him support. I do not stand in his shoes, i do not know what is in his mind.

I told my boyfriend i m going to write something about this. He ask me why, u know, just as I said earlier, this is something that happen 2-3 years ago. Why do i still write this? I told him this is something that haunted me for many years too. I actually wanted to write about this so many times, I am also the one who carry this thing with me, maybe not, but because someone keep on mentioning this matter to me all the time, I seems like cant let go it too. W talked to me about this all the time 2 years before, I always received phone calls from him at night, telling me how sad was he. I also have K talked to me about this problem in MSN. I have to understand how these actually have the impact in their live. How people feel when they aren't happy in their live, especially it's about relationship, about love.

I don't actually know the purpose of this post. I just want to say something that i know, something happen around me, something that happen to my friends. And for your information, there's still more things that i haven't tell you.


After talking to someone else about this, i got something more to say.
Why i am writing this? I kinda understand myself now.
I am asking him to let go, but me myself is being haunted by this matter too. When he talked to me, my memory will go back to the time when this happen. If i m asking people to let go, i should let go the things myself too. If i cant do it myself, how can i ask people to do so.

Another thing is, i kinda give up in persuading him. I talked to him so many times, but he never listen!! I don't have time already, k?? I GIVE UP!!!

sometimes you need someone to talk to you, to give you more inspiration.yea.


  1. i kinda know who you're talking abt.
    oh well different people hav got different approaches to their problems..its good that you're a happy go lucky person but unfortunately not everyone in the world is...:)
    thatss why sometimes i feel that its good to be forgetful haha. lets host a club called the "Good To Be Forgetful Club"

  2. yea..good to be forgetful sometimes...
    its a way to treat yourself good as well as others..why making people around u suffer with u??

  3. =) Let's FORgive and FORget!!!

  4. It's always easy to say anything when it doesn't involve u at all.

    I've seen it from inside and outside, had friends who had similiar situations, and i see myself just brushing aside all these stuff without even caring how the other person felt, i can't expect anyone to understand that at all.

    Besides, it's not like i said all this just to gain any pity or just trying to convince ppl that he's evil and i'm not. It really is up to every single person to evaluate, compare and weigh all the reasons before even making a decision. But similiarly one should not expect me to forget anything from this situation at all. I'm not like you guys, it is something branded to my soul and neither am I a person who just forgives and forgets. So please, think before u say forgive and forget. This is not something i can just kiss and hug away.

    I'm sorry and i will not trouble u with this matter anymore.

    Neither will i forgive.

    And forget.

    We can never live in our past, but it lives on within us.

    I have changed, you know. For good or worse, we shall see.


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